Planning/Wedding day etiquette
Wedding day etiquette · WordsA few lines they will keep
Couples read every card, often more than once, and keep the best ones. Three or four sincere lines beat a long letter. Here is what to write for every kind of guest.
- LengthThree or four sentences
- Open withBoth names
- Mention money?Lightly, or not at all
- Sign withYour full name if they might not know you
Congratulate, add one personal line, wish them well, sign off warmly. That is the whole card.
A wedding card does three jobs: it congratulates, it says something only you could say, and it tells the couple clearly who it is from. That last part matters more than you would think when they are writing thank-you notes weeks later.
If the card goes with a cash gift or a cheque, a light line about using it is fine. Avoid stating the amount.
Four lines, in this order
Greeting
“Dear Ana and Leo,” using both names.
Congratulations
“Congratulations on your wedding day.”
Something personal
A memory, what you admire about them as a couple, or what you loved about the day.
A wish and sign-off
A hope for their future, then “With love,” and your name.
Messages to borrow
I have watched you two become a team over the past six years, and today was everything you deserve. Here is to the next sixty. All my love, Priya.
Welcome to the family, Sam. We have loved you for years and are so happy to make it official. With love, Aunt Carol and Uncle Rick.
Add your team or surname so they place you.Congratulations on your wedding! Wishing you both a lifetime of happiness. Warmly, Daniel from the design team.
Congratulations, Mei and Tom. We hope this helps with the honeymoon, or the first very good dinner in your new home. With love, the Wongs.
Thank you for having me to celebrate with you. It was a beautiful day. Congratulations, and best wishes, Jordan (Alex’s partner).
Cards are welcome for months after the wedding.We are a little late with this, but no less happy for you both. Congratulations on your marriage. With love, Kate and Ian.
Small rules, big difference
Do
- Write by hand, even if it is short.
- Use both names, spelled correctly.
- Sign your full name if they may not know your handwriting.
- Seal cash or cheques inside, and write your name on the envelope.
Don’t
- State the gift amount.
- Write jokes about marriage being a prison or a ball and chain.
- Mention exes, fertility or anyone who is not there by choice.
- Leave the card unsigned or signed “from us”.

Couples often keep a few cards to photograph with their rings or flowers. A handwritten card in good handwriting, on good paper, has made it into more than one of our detail flat lays.
Lulan Studio · wedding photographers & filmmakers
Wedding cards, answered
What do you write in a wedding card?
Address both names, congratulate them, add one personal line, wish them well, and sign off with your name. Three or four sentences is plenty.
What do you write in a wedding card with money?
Congratulate the couple and add a light line such as “We hope this helps with the honeymoon.” Do not mention the amount.
What do you write in a wedding card for a coworker?
Keep it warm and simple: “Congratulations on your wedding! Wishing you both a lifetime of happiness,” and sign with your full name.
Is it too late to send a wedding card?
No. A card is welcome for months after the wedding. Acknowledge the delay lightly and send it.
Keep reading, before the big day
All twenty guides live in our wedding day etiquette collection.
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