Wedding moments without a first look: first touch and family reveals

The first touch and the family first look

If you are not planning a first look, you can always do what is called a first touch. We position you on either side of a door, or around a wall, where you are able to touch each other without seeing each other. You hold hands and share notes or a letter, which the other person reads out.

It is an incredibly romantic moment between the two of you, even without a glimpse of each other, and it produces the kind of photographs a traditional first look does: the reaction, the tears, the laugh at a line in the letter. It also gives you a few minutes alone before a day full of people.

Besides the moment with your future husband or wife, there is also a first look with your family: your father or mother, bridesmaids, or brothers and sisters. These are all emotional moments that can be captured. We are happy to photograph them and, if you are planning one, to arrange it on the day so everything runs smoothly.

Setting up a first touch that works

The setup is simple but the details matter. A doorway with the door half open, a corner of a hallway, or a screen at the venue all work; the point is that hands can meet and eyes cannot. We check the spot for light and foot traffic.

Letters are the part couples remember. Write them a few days before, keep them short enough to read aloud without rushing, and hand them to us or your coordinator in the morning. If you would rather speak than read, that works too; the video catches the words either way.

First looks with parents and the wedding party

A father seeing his daughter in her dress, or a mother helping with the veil, is often the most emotional moment of the morning, and it happens whether or not there is a couple's first look. The difference is planning it rather than letting it happen in a crowded room.

We suggest doing the reveal once you are fully dressed, with the room cleared of everyone except the person you are revealing to. Bridesmaids can be lined up with their backs turned and asked to turn together. Brothers and sisters often prefer something less staged, and we adapt.

• Choose one or two reveals; each needs a few quiet minutes.
• Do the family reveal after the dress and veil are on.
• Decide beforehand whether the moment is photo only or photo and video.