Planning a tea ceremony for a Chinese or Vietnamese wedding

How the tea ceremony morning unfolds

If you are planning a Vietnamese or Chinese wedding with the tea ceremony on the same day, set aside a good amount of time at the beginning of the day. It usually happens around 9:00 a.m., or even a bit earlier.

We typically come into the house, usually the bride's home, and start with photos of her getting ready: a few details, some beauty shots, personal portraits, all before the groom arrives. We also photograph the decoration of the home and the families getting ready for their guests. That takes about 30 minutes.

Then we transition to the bridesmaids getting ready for the groomsmen and the groom coming in. At Vietnamese weddings there is a gift exchange, which we love to document. At Chinese weddings there are games and blockades for the guys before they can come in. Either one takes time, generally anywhere between 30 minutes and about an hour before the groom enters the house.

The tea ceremony itself depends on the number of guests, or pairs of family members, who need to be served. For a list of about 50 people it usually takes about 30 minutes; a much bigger family takes longer, and we often do family photos right after the tea, or before it. A big tea ceremony is usually about 3 hours and a smaller one about two hours.

Group photos and the couple after the tea

Once the tea is finished, we generally gather everybody for group photos: the whole family first, then the whole wedding party, then some photos of the two of you. At a big tea ceremony this is what pushes the morning toward 3 hours.

If a Western ceremony follows the same day, the couple photos here can be brief: enough to have you in your traditional outfits, at home, with the decorations behind you. If the tea ceremony is the main event, we take our time.

Small versus large tea ceremonies

The two-hour versus three-hour difference is mostly the guest list. A tea ceremony for close family, with a short serving list, moves quickly, and the gift exchange or door games become the longest part. A large one needs the full 3 hours.

Whichever you are planning, protect two things: the early start, and the quiet half hour before the groom arrives. When the groomsmen show up before we have photographed the bride and the home, the morning compresses and the calm portraits go first.